Real Friends and Fake Books

So, a couple days ago, I mentioned I was writing a fake back cover blurb for a fake book that will never be written, just for the heck of it. Several people asked me to share it, so here’s the whole story:

Two of my friends (who happen to be fine writers) and I exchange daily check-ins on our writing progress. This started…maybe 4-5 years ago.  And while we sometimes miss a few days, it’s been a great way to stay honest about word count and productivity, and also to keep up with other things going on in our lives.  One of my friends is Eric Witchey and our check in the other day, went like this:

Me: “Monday: Some word count, got stuck in a plot twist.”

Eric: “Monday: Folded in edits. Delivered the story. Stuck in a plot twist? Sounds like a Thursday Next novel.”

Me: “Tuesday: More writing. (also with apologies to the fine Mr. Jasper Fforde, and: Parody, parody! Please don’t sue me!)

STUCK IN A PLOT TWIST

When Thursday Next tries to enter the world of literature she discovers she has
mistakenly taken a TICKET TO RIDE to party game world where the evil
CRANIUM has caused TROUBLE with the SETTLERS OF CATAN. Will Thursday
RISK her LIFE to find the one CLUE that will CONNECT 4 great lands
together? To save the SMALLWORLD from CRANIUM, Thursday must steal a
BATTLESHIP, fight a BARREL OF MONKEYS and survive a brutal TWISTER.
Can Thursday and her brave friends SCRABBLE to pull off an OPERATION that
will send CRANIUM to the GUILLOTINE? Or will she say goodbye to her LAST NIGHT ON EARTH as party game world falls, BANG! like DOMINOES?

–“Exciting! I had ANTS IN MY PANTS to the very end”  –reviewer person”

Eric: “Tuesday: ROTFLOL”

And there you have it.  The fake back cover blurb to a fake book that will (thankfully) never be written. 🙂